Sung to the tune of Me And My Shadow, it is interesting that the “me” in the song is obviously the body. But, as A Course in Miracles says,
God did not make the body, because it is destructible, and therefore not of the Kingdom. The body is the symbol of what you think you are. It is clearly a separation device, and therefore does not exist…(The Holy Spirit) always tells you that only the mind is real because only the mind can be shared. The body is separate, and therefore cannot be a part of you. To be of one mind is meaningful, but to be one body is meaningless. By the laws of mind, then, the body is meaninglessACIM T-6.V.A.2.1-3 & 3.2-5
So, the “me” in this post is what Ken Wapnick calls the Decision-Maker, aka the soul. Like everyone else on Earth, I soon learned the dual nature of physical manifestation, that pain follows pleasure. The first dramatic lesson came when I was ten years old and caught polio in the public swimming pool, a year before the vaccine came out. While I had a mild case, it restricted my athletic ability, which gave me emotional pain, and as the body aged, the resulting Scoliosis has given me physical pain.
Addressing the Law of Karma, my spiritual Teacher taught that personal responsibility begins at age ten. Prior to that, whatever befell us was our parents’ responsibility. So, I figured the polio had been an effect of a prior miscreation of mine and by accepting that limitation I had cleared the way for the spiritual progress I was realizing in this life.
In the section of Chapter 2 in the Course entitled Cause and Effect, Jesus says that fear comes from thoughts, and “The fearful must miscreate, because they misperceive creation (and) When you miscreate you are in pain (ACIM, T-2.VII.3:8-9).” So, our thoughts create and thoughts based on false premises miscreate, which causes pain.
In the Introduction to the Text of ACIM, Jesus says, “The opposite of love is fear, but what is all-encompassing can have no opposite,” and sums up the Course with “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.” Thus, fear is a miscreation, is unreal and does not exist. And it follows that pain is also unreal and does not exist. In fact, one could extend a bit further and realize that this body and hence, the world, are also unreal and do not exist.
Be that as it may, my situation is such that I do feel pain, which means I experience myself as a body subject to misperception, fear and miscreation. And, as my life progressed beyond my Teacher’s lifetime, I became embroiled in the confusion of this world like everyone else. I made the world real in my mind, sought my own personal advantage, believed in the dream of separation, and enlisted in magic to solve my “problems.”
All who believe in separation have a basic fear of retaliation and abandonment. They believe in attack and rejection, so that is what they perceive and teach and learn. These insane ideas are clearly the result of dissociation and projection. What you teach you are, but it is quite apparent that you can teach wrongly, and can therefore teach yourself wrong.ACIM, T-6.V-B.1:1-4
Perceiving myself as having been abandoned, I adopted Mantak Chia’s Taoist Secrets of Love, without abandoning my belief in separation. The resulting sex addiction simply increased the pain from the Scoliosis. Every addiction follows the same pattern of cause and effect. The ego’s mantra of sin, guilt and fear, based on the separation idea, reinforces the addictive behavior, whether the addiction is to substances or processes (like codependence or sex).
Fear is always a sign of strain, arising whenever what you want conflicts with what you do. ²This situation arises in two ways: First, you can choose to do conflicting things, either simultaneously or successively. ³This produces conflicted behavior, which is intolerable to you because the part of the mind that wants to do something else is outraged. ⁴Second, you can behave as you think you should, but without entirely wanting to do so. ⁵This produces consistent behavior, but entails great strain. ⁶In both cases, the mind and the behavior are out of accord, resulting in a situation in which you are doing what you do not wholly want to do. ⁷This arouses a sense of coercion that usually produces rage, and projection is likely to follow. ⁸Whenever there is fear, it is because you have not made up your mind. ⁹Your mind is therefore split, and your behavior inevitably becomes erratic. ¹⁰Correcting at the behavioral level can shift the error from the first to the second type, but will not obliterate the fear.ACIM, T-2.VI.5:1-10
In seeking to diminish the pain from the Scoliosis, I found the Somatic Movement Center and a series of exercises that increased my subtle awareness, giving me conscious control over the autonomic nervous system and reprogramming the muscles that have distorted the skeletal structure of my body. But, I found that my addictive behavior reinforced the old muscle tensions, interfering with the healing process. Therefore, I have to give up the fear-based addiction. “³No one who learns from experience that one choice brings peace and joy while another brings chaos and disaster needs additional convincing (ACIM, T-4.VI.3:3).” I must “Be vigilant only for God and His Kingdom (ACIM, T-6.V-C.2:8)”.
The Holy Spirit calls you both to remember and to forget. ²You have chosen to be in a state of opposition in which opposites are possible. ³As a result, there are choices you must make. ⁴In the holy state the will is free, so that its creative power is unlimited and choice is meaningless. ⁵Freedom to choose is the same power as freedom to create, but its application is different. ⁶Choosing depends on a split mind. ⁷The Holy Spirit is one way of choosing. ⁸God did not leave His children comfortless, even though they chose to leave Him. ⁹The voice they put in their minds was not the Voice for His Will, for which the Holy Spirit speaks.ACIM, T-5.II.6:1-9